“You are in a relationship all the time"; Dr Saloni Singh's Story
A Story of Life & Relationship Coach Saloni Singh
Aren’t we in a relationship all the time? Sometimes we are in relationship with nature, sometimes with people, sometimes with animals and birds, yet we mostly forget to relate within. One, who does not have a comfortable relationship with self, never has a genuine relationship with others.
Why I took a U turn in my life?
How it all started was that I realised in the very first year of my Medicine degree, that I was more curious to understand human mind, emotions and psychology rather than medicine and surgery. I spent more time reading leadership and psychology authors like Stephen Covey, John Gray and so on. I was known as the problem solver and optimist among my friends. This was 1993.
My friends had pointed out on many occasions, that I was made for a more creative profession than medicine. Being a part of conventional society of those days, I ignored my inclination to take a deeper quest to understand self.
I completed my graduation and post graduation in Gynecology, worked as a Gynecologist in India for sometime and then in London for few years. In the year 2006, while on my maternity break I got time to reflect on my life and life purpose. I strongly felt that even though I enjoyed medicine but this is certainly not my calling. I didn't want to continue practicing medicine and regret later for not listening to my heart.
I looked for different career options in psychology and relating to my passion of helping people understand themselves. I read the book "Be your own life coach" and met the author and UK's top most life coach Fiona Harold.
The realization came in a flash now. Life coaching was exactly aligned with my passion. Hence the turning moment came and I enrolled at the topmost academy of London to qualify as a life coach. That was just a beginning of self-realization and I completed my qualifications in Life coaching, Youth & parenting coaching and Executive coaching. I realised that this area was as vast as an ocean and I wanted to learn more techniques to help my clients. After a while, I started studying NLP or Neuro linguistic programming and completed my Master Practitioner course with Richard Bandler, the scientist behind NLP.
And then began a beautiful journey
Then I decided to quit my prestigious NHS job and start as a life coach. With my first few clients I realised that at the core of most life issues was lack of self love and self worth. I started studying Louise Hay and other spiritual teachers’ work. And a very crucial moment of my life was when I went to attend a lecture by Hay House author and Founder of Happiness Project, Dr Robert Holden. I knew in my first interaction with him that I'd found 'my Guru.' Robert talked about a very powerful concept that "No amount of self improvement can compensate for the lack of self acceptance”.
I completed my Happiness coaching certification with Robert and also worked with him on his project on 'Love n Fear'. Robert also shared about his Indian Yogi friend and many eastern teachings. One more signal had probably come from the Universe. I started reading Bhagwat Gita and realised how beautifully its text describes the power of understanding self and oneness.
I was so excited with my new realizations on self. So I began to inspire and support my clients to infuse trust, faith & love in everything they do, stay connected with who they are and take practical actions from the state of self and universal love. I attracted clients who wanted to work on personal issues be it executives, entrepreneurs, professionals or housewives. They brought marital issues with spouses or parenting issues or self issues like addictions to my notice, and we focussed on working with the relationship with self first. The stronger and more loving relationships they developed with themselves, their minds and emotions, the more powerful they became to handle any issues in their lives.
Back to India, home sweet home
After staying 9 years in UK, we returned back home. I was so excited to serve people here, though I had my share of doubts, how will people respond as life coaching in India.
I started conducting parenting workshops and slowly people started coming for 1:1 coaching. Most of them shared that they never knew that such support is available and they were so happy to find it.
Some people still feel that life can just go on like that, even if they are not happy in their relationships; that's a part of life. Sometimes they accept, they sulk, take out anger and most of the time they make themselves busy. Busy in trivial things, thinking there is no way out and they have to stay like that for the sake of children or society.
My message to everyone is that we're here on this planet to really be the joy that we are! The moment we realise this beautiful truth about ourselves and that we have the power to transform our lives irrespective of the circumstances or kind of people in our life, the miracle begins. And the path will appear.
I do not consider myself the shero of the story and give the credit to my husband who always supported me and gave me freedom to follow my bliss.
I feel the most powerful villain is within - The inner Critic; who tells us why we we are not good enough or as good or fortunate as the others are! I came face to face with my inner critic many times and tamed the dragon by being thankful that it tried to keep me safe in comfort zone, but at the same time reached for my higher self which gave me an opportunity to stretch and seek my dream. I am grateful for the love and support of my in-laws too.
Yes there is always a challenge as a life, relationship & parenting coach to walk my talk. I remember once my hubby and daughter pointing out I am a coach when I raised my voice on the kids. And I clearly know that nobody (including me) can be a perfect human. We all are on a lifelong journey of learning and growing. Being a life coach has certainly helped me immensely as I do my best to follow what I preach. Also I am so aware when I don't and come back to my powerful self easily.
The rewards as a life & relationship coach are tremendous. I feel overwhelmed when a couple told me you are a Godsend and saved our marriage when after 10 years of arguments and fights, we had no hope we could live happily. I did not advise them what to do but helped them start completely fresh. They saw the life and relationship in a completely new light, where it was not based on compromises and adjustments but being a person who is in control of their mind, emotions and happiness.
I plan to continue 1:1 life coaching, parenting workshops, and also starting relationship workshops for couples and young people too. I am a happy mom of 2 girls, 12 and 7.5 years old and no doubt parenting has been the most spiritual experience of my life :)
Manmeet Kumar Associate Director- Sales at Carlson Wagonlit Travel I would highly recommend Dr. Saloni as a life coach. Her greatest strength is her ability to connect one to one and recommend what really works. I have had a wonderful experience with her. Her methods and techniques are unique and really work!
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